Automousation

“Krullestaart!” Snorrebaard storms Krullestaart small workshop and shouts agitated. “Where are those E-Cheese Printers? Since our moon-ad is placed, we are flooded by orders!”

“Listen, you Cheese Executive Officer, it was not my idea to advertise the product, even before we started the production. I’m busy night and day to refurbish old toasters and printers into E-Cheese printers, but I cannot do more then three pieces a day.”

“Only three a day? Our customers have been downloading more then 4000 Free Sandwich Configurators already! Even the first licences to print E-Cheese Sandwiches have been sold. If you are that slow with the hardware production, we will be lynched by our customers. Can’t you hire a couple of rats from the rubbish dump nearby? They could help us, couldn’t they?”

“Rats? This is a job for highly qualified personnel!”

“But you have to do something, Krullestaart. After all, you are the Cheep Operations Officer here.”

“Hmm… wait… have you ever heard about automousation?

“What?”

Auto-mice are computer mice with reversed USB-connections. This way they become output devices, in stead of input devices. Especially the old mechanical mice, those which use a ball as sensor, are interesting. They can even drive around on command. After the introduction of the optical mouse, millions have been disposed off on the electronic scrap graveyard. I could try to employ them for our production. That is called automousation.”

“And you think such robo-mice can deal with your highly specialized tasks… can they screw at all?”

“I just have to modify the scroll wheel a bit”

“And are they able to make complex 3D movements?”

“For that, I will pimp up a game controller with grabbers.”

“Well, then… it’s fine with me. But don’t waste our time. Tomorrow the new production line must be up and running.”

Keep up the good work!

The Quatschtronauts

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